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For the past nine months I have tried to get the number out of my head. 38. To me, the number 38 stood for embarrassment. 38-0 at Michigan. 38-12 at Syracuse. 38 represented miserable "L" bookends for the 2003 season. What was in between? Four impressive wins and five unimpressive losses. A mark that aptly demonstrated the unbearable inconsistency of a team that lacked both leadership and fortitude. And, just when I think I have gotten to the point where I can think about watching Notre Dame play a game, and not focus on those two digits--it comes up again. 38. Apparently the coaches have been using that number for motivation in the off-season.

And, I thought to myself, motivation for what? Getting plastered at Corby's? None of us needed to be constantly reminded of that dreadful number, let alone the players. But, yet, there it was, tossed in their faces everywhere they went. Practice. The weight room. Heck, Ty was probably in their dorm rooms making sure they were tuned in to channel 38 on TV. For a man who stressed the positive, this sure sounded like hypocrisy to me. Had Mr. Positive turned into Mr. Negative?

After a 5-7 season, wouldn't it have made more sense to put Tony Robbins on speed dial?

Still, as I have always done, I decided to give Ty the benefit of the doubt. I thought maybe he was on to something here, and I should at least put this motivational tool into practice before I dismissed it as faulty. So, I decided to give the Willingham method a try around the 'ol office. When "Ted" in accounting (I won't use his real name, but for any of you who work in an office, you know this "guy") jammed up the fax machine the other day by loading more than thirty sheets of paper into the top loader (the copier was out of commission and Ted was using the fax as a copier to make "emergency copies) I got my chance. Now the fax was hopelessly jammed by a very small piece of paper we could not remove--and the office ground to a complete halt while we waited for a repairman. The way folks were acting; you would think we were in the grips of an administrative nuclear winter.

Nice going, Ted.

Everyone wanted to know how many sheets Ted had tried to load in the fax. The answer? "Maybe 50," he reluctantly admitted. 50? A whole 20 sheets over the limit. Unforgivable. So, for the rest of the day, any time I saw Ted, I simply said, "30." Just to remind him of his embarrassing overage. I also typed 30 on a sheet of paper and taped it up on the wall in his office. Every hour I sent him an e-mail with the now infamous number--30--in the subject line. No, "Dear Ted," or, "Hey Ted," or "What's up?" Just 30. I also added another 30 in the body of the e-mail in 72-font size--just for extra emphasis. Others quickly joined in to help me try to "motivate" Ted to be more cognizant of our office expectations. Ted's failure to load at or less than 30 sheets of paper into the top feeder of the fax machine caused us all a lot of grief and we felt very disappointed in him--and wanted to make sure he knew that.

Boy did he get the point. In fact, it sounded as though Ted would probably only go with 15 or 20 pages with the top loader if he needed to use the fax to make "emergency" copies in the future. The Ty method had seemingly worked wonders.

Now, would Ted have learned that lesson without this motivational help? I'd like to think, possibly, but I'm just not sure. Maybe one late night when the copier was not working again--and no one was around--he might have risked it. Maybe 40 sheets. But, not after this. Not after tattooing the number 30 onto his brain. And, as I thought more about what Ty was trying to accomplish with his own motivational number--38--it hit me.

In retrospect, maybe a "negative" experience can be a very "positive" experience. Will this focus on the negative as a positive reap rewards in the upcoming season? I must admit--I'm not sure. All we can hope for is that something in those losses--and the number--38--motivated our Irish to work a little harder in the off-season. To do some extra reps. To run an extra sprint. To flip through that complicated play book one more time. To do whatever it takes to never have to think about that despicable number again.

Now, I highly doubt Ted is walking around with 30 stuck in his head for the same reason the Irish are focused on 38. But, if obsessing over a number gets the Irish to play inspired, determined football, I'm all for it.

This season, let's hope the Irish are on the right side of 38. And Ted is on the right side of 30. Otherwise, we might all need to put Tony Robbins on speed dial.

Please send questions or comments for Todd Carr to nddomehome@hotmail.com