Okay, so that’s a bit of a misnomer, as we’re technically one fight past the halfway point in the second season of The Contender, but it gets difficult trying make a relevant reference to the timeline of the show while maintaining an obligatory nod to a classic Stallone turd (in this case, “Over The Top”).  Just work with me.  This lame intro was brought to you by Toyota Tundra trucks. 

Now that we’re at a decent stopping point with the show, it’s a good time to recap the highs and the lows thus far, so let’s review the brave souls who reached the final 8:

Cornelius Bundrage

K-9 surprised quite a few with his unanimous decision victory over Michael Clark, an over-rated paper tiger who bit off slightly more than he could chew by calling out Bundrage in the first days of training.

What was surprising about this fight wasn’t so much Bundrage’s skill set in the ring (his jab is terrible and his punches have awful form), but that he actually looks more like a freaking Cruiserweight.  Short of pulling a Britney Spears Ex-Lax job and shitting out his innards prior to the weigh-in, I have no idea how he made it below 150.  Seeing his freakish physique next to shrimpy Clark during the pre-fight instructions was a serious eye-opener (probably much more so to poor Mike, who’d spent Week 1 as the self-proclaimed star of the Gold Team). 

Still yet, once Clark figured out how to slip inside, he took control and appeared well on his way to pulling off a decision, before his glass jaw gave way to an awkward, ugly hook from Bundrage in the final round.  I have to believe that a fighter with good reach and smart punching would frustrate the hell out of him.  And since we’re on the subject…..

Walter Wright

Gave easily the most dominant performance of the first round of fights.  He won every second of every round against Andre Eason, who was probably as surprised as anyone to even to be on the show (that’s another blog discussion altogether).  Wright had every punch working effectively, especially the jab-cross-hook combo that flattened Eason in the first round.  He even flashed a little Tommy Hearns style; baiting, switching, and throwing off-handed shots to confuse the dumpy slug he was facing.  The issue at hand with Wright is that his victory – while absolute and decisive – left two questions unanswered.

First, once he realized that he owned his opponent (which was approximately 45 seconds into Round 1), how in the hell did he let it go the distance?  Teammate Steve Forbes spent the entire bout screaming from the stands that the same combination was open every time (and he was right), so why was Wright unable or unwilling to close him out after the early and easy knockdown?  I recognize the value of smart fighting and avoiding over-confidence, but it was clear early on that Eason’s Rudy-like flurries wouldn’t have ripped open a construction paper banner, let alone inflict damage on a decent fighter.  The fact that Walter nonetheless chose to sit back and potshot from a distance until the final bell calls to question whether or not he’s a killer.  It bothered me.

Second, for a fighter with his height and reach (and aforementioned extra caution), his rhythm was oddly disrupted every time Andre started throwing punches.  And he seemed to get hit by a LOT of them.  What’s going to happen when he’s in the ring with an opponent conditioned well enough to throw more than one of those flurries every 2 rounds, as opposed to a Winn-Dixie bag boy?  We’re going to find out next week when he fights Bundrage.

Gary Balletto

I really haven’t figured this guy out.  He appears to be one of the best-conditioned fighters in the competition, and yet he had nothing left in the tank by the end of his miserable-to-watch fight against Aaron Torres (another contestant whose talent-to-mouth ratio was frighteningly low). 

As I noted last time around, he’s a power puncher who’s knocked out 3 out of every 4 guys he’s ever fought.  However, he missed on almost every shot he threw for the first round or two, essentially punching himself drunk to the point that he was nearly knocked out two rounds later.  By Aaron freaking Torres!!! 

It should be noted that Gary often fought at lighter weights earlier on, so perhaps the power advantage he previously enjoyed is somewhat negated against natural Welterweights and Junior Middleweights, who make up the bulk of the competition on the show. 

As a side note, I have no idea why, after such a struggle, he chose Bravo as his next opponent, when Bravo is basically the same fighter as Torres.  That is, if Torres had any punching power and a set of balls. 

Micheal Stewart

I’m going to go ahead and say it – listening to him talk is an excruciating exercise in tolerance.  His Delaware East Coast-trailer park voice makes me want to sit in a bathtub and drop a plugged-in toaster on my lap.  Painful.  On top of that, I think his gum-smacking wife is the lady who rang up my condoms at Rite-Aid at 2 in the morning last week. 

I feel better.

Stewart’s pretty lucky to be around.  He’s not particularly polished and didn’t seem to show much in his first fight against Ebo Elder, getting smacked around and controlled for 5 rounds before landing a big (?) shot that stunned Elder long enough to get finished off.   

What’s disappointing is that Stewart was clearly the less-skilled boxer (by a long shot).  Ebo had great hand-speed, worked the body and the head effectively, and good conditioning.  Unfortunately, his chin seems to be made from the same spackling material as Michael Clark’s, as his Contender stay ended face-first near the ropes in the 4th round, despite having dominated the fight from start to finish. 

Equally disappointing is that we lost the guy who looks like a cross between Yoda and the Domino’s Pizza “Noid,” and sounds like Terry Bowden on a Xanex bender. 

I’m fairly certain he’ll be sent packing in the next round by Brewer.  And while I’m on the subject……

Grady Brewer

(By the way, my overdone segues are brought you by Sierra Mist and Toyota Motors). 

 
Brewer isn’t the most polished fighter around – his swings are wild and he doesn’t move his head nearly enough – but he looked awfully tough in his victory over Vinroy Barrett, who looked a lot more talented than I’d have guessed.  Brewer repeatedly took his best shots and continued to throw flurries.

I mentioned this last time around, but Brewer’s fought and done quite well for himself against some competition that most of his fellow competitors haven’t (including Peter Manfredo, Sechew Powell, and Jermain Taylor).  And as he openly admitted on the show, he’s lacked good training and failed to beat these guys (although many who saw the Powell fight may disagree with that one), yet still managed to acquit himself fairly well.  While I was surprised to see him nearly run out of gas in the Barrett fight, I’m guessing he makes short work of Micheal “I Can’t Spell Michael” Stewart in the second round of the competition.  In fact, he’s staying in my final four.

Norberto “Nito” Bravo

He was exactly as advertised:  A brawler.  Zero defense, very little polish, but admirable guts and the conditioning to fight several “active” rounds.  You had to tip your hat to the guy after his split-decision win over Rudy Cisneros, as Rudy had the reach and skill advantage (although I think had it been a 7-round bout, the late-to-show-up Rudy would have taken the decision). 

I don’t see anyone knocking him out, and he’s basically one of those Fernando Vargas guys who isn’t quite as good as the more athletically gifted fighters in his category, yet is tough enough to win a slugfest when his opponent is willing to stay inside and trade blows.  And because his next opponent is Balletto, he’s probably making the final four. 

Steve Forbes

You knew I was saving the best for last.  This guy can flat-out box.  Stevie has absolutely every tool in the freaking box; hand-speed straight out of a scene from The Matrix , outstanding footwork, tremendous conditioning, and the ability to throw every possible punch in every possible combination from every possible angle with stunning precision and effectiveness.

What really sets him apart, however, is his defense.  His hands are always in the right place to block his opponent’s shots (he usually seems to see them coming well before they’re thrown), his head is never in the same place for more than a second to be hit, and he’s always out of the line of fire the split-second he finishes one of his sick combos.  It’s really elite stuff. 

The only thing that pisses me off is ESPN’s over-editing of the footage, because 90% of the “thuds” that they dub in for his opponents are completely blocked shots.  If you need more evidence than what you can see on the screen, I’d refer you to the post-fight interview with Acevedo, who looked like someone held his face into the curb and kicked it repeatedly.  Forbes, on the other hand, despite being stunned early in the fight, seemed to have minimal damage. 

In fact, he only seems to have two weaknesses in this tournament.  First, he’s a naturally smaller guy than his competitors, most of whom have fought as high as Middleweight during their careers.  Forbes has never been higher than a Welterweight, and in fact spent most of his career as a Lightweight in the 130-lb. range.  While his speed and defense make up for that, it’s highly unlikely he can knock any of them out (unless Elder or Michael Clark came back for some reason).  The flipside, of course, is that he doesn’t have to diet or endure overly stressful workouts to make weight, meaning he generally has a massive advantage when it comes to stamina and staying power.  And yes, I know how that sounds.  Eat me. 

Second, because he’s a veteran of championship fights, Forbes is definitely a 12-round boxer.  And while it’s great that he has no issues getting winded in these shorter bouts, he tends to start slower and feel out his opponent as if he has 11 more rounds to start unloading.  This will be less of an issue now that he’s in the final four (where the fights will be 7 rounds), but it made his victories over Curiel and Acevedo much closer than they needed to be. 

All in all, Season 2’s been a lot of fun to follow.  Three fights featured knockdowns, and with the exception of the Wright-Eason bout, each of them were reasonably competitive.  On top of this, my man Sugar Ray has hardly let us down with his marvelous attempts at melodrama.  His awkward, rambling, badly rehearsed dinner speech this week with the final eight was an absolute thing of beauty.  The feeble attempts of his meal companions to look at him like he was explaining something so profoundly deep while being unable to mask their confusion was pure gold.  We need more of this.   

You may recall that last time, I predicted a final four of Forbes, Wright, Brewer, and Elder, meaning I’m just one white trash-powered hook punch from still having a shot at nailing that through Round 2.  I’m staying with Forbes, Wright, and Brewer, and guessing that Bravo will beat Balletto to join them.   

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